Secrets

Here are some secrets about me:

I secretly want to be a gymnast.

I secretly wish I had more of a social life and spent less time studying, though I will never regret my good grades and GPA.

I secretly think I'm not good at anything.

I secretly wish I had super powers so I could fix everything wrong with my life.

I secretly wish that I wasn't so tall.

And I not so secretly wish I could change the world.

It has been brought to my attention in the last few days that some judges want pageant girls to be perfect. Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm not perfect. I am, however, a positive role model for youth around me. I am willing to share things about myself in order to help better the lives of those around me, and I am willing to make myself vulnerable to make those that feel they cannot feel more comfortable.

Yes, I have tattoos. Yes, I want to be Miss America. Yes, I believe the two can go together. And no, I will never regret the choice to get my tattoos. They have meaning to me, and almost anybody who hears the story of them respects that meaning, whether they like tattoos or not. They are not profane, and there is no way they can offend anyone (at least not anyone I have ever met). I cannot regret being who I am, and that is something I want to share with the world. I can do that by being Miss America, so judges, give me a chance. Ignore the black on my body and look at what's inside. Give my soul a chance to change the world.

Everyone has secrets, but only those who are willing to share theirs and make themselves vulnerable can make steps to change the world.

Rehearsal Numero Uno

We had our first Miss Seattle rehearsal today, and I'm even more excited than I was before. They brought in McKinley Smith (reigning Miss Seattle, and 1st Runner Up at Miss WA 2010) as a guest speaker, as well as Devanni Partridge (Miss Seattle and Miss Washington 2009), and hearing what they had to say was amazing. I felt so star struck, but the girls were so friendly and willing to answer anything we had to ask. They said we could win them over with coffee or happy hour appetizers if we wanted to meet with them one on one and that they were looking forward to getting to know all of us.

We got our schedule for a general idea of what we'll be doing over the next couple months, and everyone mark your calendars! We're hoping for October 16th for our first annual fundraiser entitled (drumroll please) "Miss Seattle's Got Talent." Last I heard it'll be a talent preview and dessert auction, and it will raise money for the program which goes directly back to us girls in the form of scholarship money. So I expect to see some people I know there!

That's about all I have for now. I'm planning on going shopping for an evening gown on Tuesday, and I never knew it'd be so hard to find a swimsuit! Until next time.

This and That

It has been a while since I have posted so I will update everyone on what I have done in the last few months. I had some personal problems and decided to take Spring 2010 Quarter on Campus at Oregon State instead of online, thus forcing me to move to Oregon for 3 months. I loved it beyond all belief, and I got to take Lipton with me, however it forced me to give up my Young Rider dreams for the year. I had been under so much stress to do well that I had forgotten why I loved riding in the first place, so it was nice to just spend some time at school with him and re-develop our relationship. We moved home for the summer and I have been working for Carolynn Bunch taking pictures and doing office work just as I have since she began her business in 2007. I have made the decision to forego Young Riders for 2011 as to me it is not worth the pressure and my education is more important, especially with a Masters Degree now in my sights.

While I was at school I made the inevitable decision to participate in the Miss Seattle beauty pageant this coming November. Yep. You read that right. I'm going to be in beauty pageants. Whomever wins the Miss Seattle pageant goes on to compete for Miss Washington, which feeds into Miss America. For those of you saying "That doesn't sound like her," well, you clearly don't know me very well. This is something I have wanted to do for a very long time and it has never been the right time. MAO offers thousands of dollars in scholarship money to help pay for undergrad and graduate school later on, and I get to do it all while wearing dresses and promoting things I believe in.

In order to compete in the pageant we need to choose a platform - an organization to volunteer for that we would like to bring awareness to and promote as something that people should donate their time and money to. Most girls choose Donate Life or The American Cancer Association, but I decided to think outside the box (as usual) and chose The Youth Suicide Prevention Program. Suicide is always something that people view as taboo to talk about when really is something that can be avoided in much larger proportions than people believe if more friends and family would pay attention to behavior changes in youth and adults.

I will be sure to post more and keep updates on how hair, makeup, dresses and everything else girly is going, as well as how Lipton is holding up.